This was written at the end of England’s European Championship match against Portugal (after about 3 and half litres of diet coke round at Dean and Trudi’s – on a real caffiene high) and was previously subtitled “what a pain in the Urs”. We now however accept that there was no conspiracy by UEFA and Urs Meier (the referee) to guarantee Portugal – the tournament hosts – a place in the semi-finals and that it was purely sour grapes on behalf of the millions and millions who saw a perfectly good goal disallowed for England. I’m not bitter.